You Have Dropped Precious Few Hints That It's Your Birthday.

When it comes to your birthday, you are as stoic as they come. You have certainly never carved "BIRTHDAY CURRENTLY" into the tread of your boots and organized a hiking trip through the mud. If anyone remembers your birthday at all, it'd be a goddamn miracle.

You Drop An Average Number Of Hints That It's Your Birthday.

Well, if it isn't Mr. or Ms. Zero Standard Deviations Away From The Mean When It Comes To Subtly Reminding People It's Your Birthday. While you won't go overboard, you will occasionally carve "BIRTHDAY CURRENTLY" into the tread of your boots and organize a hiking trip through the mud.

You Drop An Unreasonable Number Of Hints That It's Your Birthday.

You scarcely have time to celebrate your birthday because you are so preoccupied with reminding people it's your birthday in roundabout ways. The rest of your year is ruined by your obsession with letting friends know it's your birthday in ways that make it seem like you aren't outright telling them, which would be embarrassing. You miss weddings, funerals, and other friends' birthdays whiling away in a subterranean alcove or dirty root cellar coming up with every possible idea to get people to remember it's your birthday in a way that you can respond, "Oh, is it? I had forgotten." You are a hollow shell of a human, and several Central Asian countries have declared open war on you because they find you despicable. Awesome!