How Many Of These Wonderful Gun Memories Do You H... | ClickHole

1. Check off all the gun memories you have:

Sleeping on a sack of gunpowder to keep it warm for the big shoot.

Having your friends pick you up while you spit out rocks to see what it feels like to be a gun.

Your gun being a calming presence in the delivery room for the birth of your first child.

Watching the New York Yankees retire number 2 in honor of the Second Amendment.

Never knowing if it can hear you.

Firing rounds continuously for 16 hours and holding some beef strips up to the gun smoke to make “Sharpshooter’s Jerky.”

The first duel with Father.

Running out of bullets and getting to reload your gun with a couple of olives.

Losing your first tooth by tying one end of a string to your tooth and the other end to a bullet, then shooting it out of a sniper rifle.

General brandishment.

Running to the mailbox every afternoon to see if someone has mailed you a gun.

Shooting harps.

Stomping on loose cartridges to make bullet wine.

Throwing guns at birds with my father to get a loose grasp of the concept of hunting.

Swearing an oath with the gun range instructor that you’ll shoot each other if egg prices rise to $4.75 a dozen.

Results for How Many Of These Wonderful Gun Memories Do You Have?

You Are Bursting At The Seams With Wonderful Gun Memories!
Wow! Your brain is politely tapping on your skull due to all the joyous gun memories jammed in there! You remember untying your shoes slowly using the barrel of the gun and also shooting into the deep end of the pool from the high dive. The best news is that you can still make more ecstatic gun memories whenever you want—go out there and continue to have a gun!

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Results for How Many Of These Wonderful Gun Memories Do You Have?

You Have An Average Number Of Wonderful Gun Memories!
Nice! You can mark "has average amount of wonderful gun memories" on your next census form. You remember untying your shoes slowly using the barrel of the gun, but not shooting into the deep end of the pool from the high dive. The good news is that you still have time to make more ecstatic gun memories—go out there and have a gun!

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Results for How Many Of These Wonderful Gun Memories Do You Have?

You Have A Sorry Few Wonderful Gun Memories!
Did you even used to have a gun? When you try to access your memory for joyous gun memories like untying your shoes slowly using the barrel of the gun, it comes up blank. The good news is that you still have time to make ecstatic gun memories—go out there and get a gun!

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