How Many Of These Prayers Have You Said For Van M... | ClickHole

1. Check off all the prayers you’ve said for Van Morrison below:

Dear God, please show mercy at Van Morrison’s hubristic affront of putting rock and soul in the same song. Amen.

Dear Lord, please give Van Morrison a third hand so that he can play guitar and hold a microphone at the same time. Amen.

Holy Spirit of light and love, give Van Morrison a dog that looks as much like himself as possible while still being a dog and not a human. Amen.

O Holy Spirit, please find Van Morrison and tell him dinner is ready and give him a ride home. Amen.

O God, please grant Van Morrison the power to have ”Tupelo Honey” licensed to be used in a Tropicana commercial. Amen.

Please Lord, make sure that Van Morrison never forgets the lyrics to any of his songs, because that would be very embarrassing for him. Amen.

Blessed be Van Morrison, and may his hair always dry quickly after showering. Amen.

If God could transfer all my luck, I pray one day Van’s hat becomes unstuck. Amen.

If he doesn’t have one already, I hope Van Morrison gets a bass. Amen.

Dear Lord, please look kindly on any of Van Morrison’s new stuff. Amen.

I think about this until I cry; may Van learn the French horn before he dies. Amen.

O Jesus, are you listening to me? I want you to give Van Morrison $50. Amen.

Results for How Many Of These Prayers Have You Said For Van Morrison?

You Have Said Nary A Prayer For Van Morrison.
When you kneel down next to your bed to scream with God, Van Morrison could not be further from your thoughts. Never mind that he gave the world "Caravan" and "Sweet Thing," you have no space for Belfast's preeminent songsmith in your prayers. Hopefully God doesn't forget to make Van Morrison come to heaven when the time comes. But if he does, that's on you, jefe.

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Results for How Many Of These Prayers Have You Said For Van Morrison?

You Have Said A Handful Of Prayers For Van Morrison.
When you send your shouts to heaven, a select few involve the cultural corporal of Belfast, Mr. Van Morrison. Whether you are wishing for Van to finally figure out how to play an E chord or simply asking God to keep him free from all train-based hazards, Van is never far from your spiritual thoughts. Nice.

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Results for How Many Of These Prayers Have You Said For Van Morrison?

You Pray For Van Morrison Almost Exclusively.
When you shout your qualms to heaven, nearly all of them involve the cultural corporal of Belfast, Mr. Van Morrison. Whether you are wishing for Van to finally figure out how to play an E chord or simply asking God to keep him free from all train-based hazards, Van is the only person you want our lord to know about. Perfect!

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