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Results for What Do You Wish To Confess, My Child?
You Are Welcome To God’s Eternal Kingdom
You need not perform any penance, as you have committed virtually no sins. You have neither taken the Lord’s name in vain nor introduced a business associate as Christ. The Kingdom of Heaven awaits you, my child.
Go now, and share news of your salvation with your friends. -
Results for What Do You Wish To Confess, My Child?
Pray 10 Hail Marys And Five Our Fathers
My child, you have committed a few light sins, from quoting The Office in a eulogy to getting the words “Another Man’s Wife” tattooed inside a heart on both arms. You need to pray 10 Hail Marys and five Our Fathers to be forgiven.
Go now, and share your penance with your friends. -
Results for What Do You Wish To Confess, My Child?
Pray 10 Hail Marys, Five Our Fathers, And A Glory Be
My child, you have committed a number of sins, from whispering “Dracula” to a dog to coming up with the idea for segregated schools. Pray 10 Hail Marys, five Our Fathers, and one Glory Be in order to be forgiven.
Go now, and share your penance with your friends. -
Results for What Do You Wish To Confess, My Child?
You Are Damned To Hell For Eternity
You have committed too many sins, my child, from using the household scissors for pubic matters to making your friends feel like they had to go to your improv show. There is no longer any penance that can save you now, and you are doomed to spend the rest of eternity in Hell.
Go now, and share news of your damnation with your friends.
